first impressions

I met my soon-to-be wife on eHarmony.

The site's claim of matching people up based on some compatibility questionnaire is absurd. I was on the site twice, each time for about 6 months, and I was matched with 3,000 people. The power of an instant deep connection, which they prophesize in their ads, is thrown out the window as soon as you're bombarded with 10 new matches every day.

What matters at this point? First impressions.

Both her and I said we were excited about each other's profile. How often do you think I felt that? Maybe one out of every 100 profiles. I saw profiles I liked, I started communicating with a number of women, but only 1% of my matches made me excited and hopeful.

How is this important?

You could use your first impression to make yourself presentable to the highest number of people possible. You can get your foot in the door right away with ease.

On the other hand, you could use your first impression to snare the people you want and get most everyone else to go away. You speed up the process by doing this.

I'm glad my profile snared the right person in the end.

I started reading Kurt Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse-Five over the weekend, and the cover baffles me.

To be specific, it’s the tagline across the top. It reads, “Best selling author of Timequake” in white capital letters. I’m no Vonnegut buff, so I had to look up Timequake to see it was his last novel. At this point I flip open the cover of Slaughterhouse to see the list of other Vonnegut novels and realize there’s no Timequake. What? I then look at the title atop the page, which states it’s a list of Vonnegut books published by Dell. Timequake was not published by Dell.Read more

Tell me what you think when I post this name:

Rush Limbaugh

Talk about a controversial figure. Forget that he has rabid fans and harsh opponents, because Rush is far more than that. He has people who cannot stand him yet agree with his views, and people who love his personality yet disagree with him on so many levels.

His willingness to stand for what he believes in is what has brought him his success. He is has the most-listened to radio show in the USA. He released a pair of #1 best-selling books in the 90's. It's the kind of success so many dream about.

It also stands in his way of some things in life.

Rush was dropped from a group of investors looking to buy the St. Louis Rams NFL franchise. On the surface it makes little sense. Limbaugh was a minority investor, not the leader of the group, and would not have much power over the Rams.Read more

Have you ever thought about your personal brand?

This has been the first 8 months of my blog's purpose. To figure out who my writing self is and what he likes to discuss. I've bounced enough ideas around to get a feel for what I can bring to the table and what I should keep tucked away. In the end, the writing I set out to do is not the writing I am going to continue to do.

Because I need to write about what I do and think about, not what I envision myself as.

That's what branding strikes me as. It's a reflection, it's a photograph. Don't worry, you can still clean up nice and tell the photographer to get your good side. Give yourself credit where credit is due. Embellishments are bad and noticeable, like a bad photoshopped picture. Remember these rules, because you're not marketing to customers, you're marketing to people, and some of them are brighter than you think.

So many people focus on the branding side of things, as if drawing people in is the most important thing in the world. In the end, what you offer is what keeps someone around. Branding is just projecting the best you have to offer. The key here: you need to offer something worth branding!Read more

If you were hired for a new position today, what would you try to do on your first day?

It’s a question we should all ask ourselves. We’re in the process of hiring a new member to our team, and it makes me think back to my first day at AiM&M. They knew I’d fit in because of how I handled the first day. What did I do?

I jumped in and offered my help in what the team was doing.

We were still figuring out how to position this new technology to prospects. I overheard some of the conversation in the room, picked up on what I could, and gave advice on how to present it better. Immediately I had credibility because I was making something positive happen. The next day I was trying out our new angle myself.

Who cares if you don’t know everything about the company, or had their official training yet? You were hired for who you are, not who you’ll become. Find someone you can help out on day one. Get involved. It’s the best way to understand what’s going on, develop relationships, and make the most of your new position.

Ever feel like the people you’re talking with are way behind you?

We could be talking intellectually, spiritually, emotionally, career-wise, relationship-wise, or any number of other things. These people seem to not have made the kind of progress you have. You realize you have to go back so far to get to their level.

Here’s what I’d like you to do: open your eyes up to what you’re looking at. Think about how you’re sizing up this person.

The easy route is to say, “He’s ahead/behind me.” You’re measuring this person using your scales, your goals, and your perspective. It’s on your terms. Not on their terms, not in the context of what they are trying to achieve, but on your terms.

There are times when this is necessary. If you’re hiring someone for a job and you need this person to have certain skills and experience, then pull out your scales and see how each candidate measures up. Rate away! “She’s got everything we need for this role.” Perfecto.

Unless there’s a reason to rate someone, why are you doing it? It’s one thing if you want to understand the distance between you and someone else. It’s another to use this against them.Read more

When I wrote about naming a company I had a little fun with some other company’s names. Now it’s my turn. While the people I mentioned in my post were more than happy to write back to me, I realize how difficult it can be to name something and love it.

I’m going to be launching a new blog with a few of the posts here and lots more new ones, focusing on taking risks and turning life into one big adventure. Naming this blog is harder than I thought. Even after all the pointers I gave in my post and when I answered a question on naming companies, I’m having quite the hard time.Read more

The majority of millionaires in the United States do not live in affluent neighborhoods, own massive mansions, or drive expensive cars.

Those were the first people the authors of “The Millionaire Next Door” looked at when they were trying to study wealth in America. What they found was the people who were worth in excess of one million dollars looked like the middle class, and the people who looked like millionaires often times were worth little more than the middle class.

Millionaires look like everyone else, and the rich aren’t so rich? What does this mean?Read more

The average job seeker has little idea how to knock someone’s socks off when applying for a job.

In the two years I’ve looked to hire people I must say I’m underwhelmed. Maybe horrified is a better word. Horrified. I’m horrified at the applications I sift through whenever I post a position. Besides the usual pitfalls – misspelled words, no cover letter, no relevant information, and sometimes no relevant job experience – most people lack any kind of style OR substance which sets them apart.

What can you do about it?Read more

What came to mind when you read the title to this post?

There’s one thing I know about what went through your head: your answer is similar to many people’s thoughts, and quite different from many other people’s first thoughts. No one’s thoughts are right or wrong, either, they’re opinions, clues into one’s perspective.Read more